De-Puff Your Stuff

Pop goes the weasel!

Wait, what does that even mean? It’s kind of graphic if you really think about it.

Okay, but really, have any of you ever felt like you could pop like that weasel? Ahem, Thanksgiving… Christmas… Thursday?

(I think I am retaining a lake)

I’m talking about feeling as if helium was pumped into your stomach like a cheap balloon. 

We’re lucky though, because we can walk around with record-breaking 1800 pound pumpkins in our stomachs (oh thank you all-you-can-eat buffets), and no one, except maybe our mother or significant other, would flinch at the sight of our “pregnancy”.

(Check out my sister and me after one of our huge sushi binges! I’m on the left.)

Celebrities on the other hand are constantly being raped by cameras from all angles causing headlines of innumerable rag mags to scream: PREGNANT WITH QUADRUPLETS!

(Whacha hiding under there Scarlett?!?! Are you picking up a PREGNANCY TEST or… Pepto-Bismol?)

If celebrities took certain deflating approaches, those “gossip gazettes” would most likely file for bankruptcy because they would have no content to print!

  • Switch to distilled water for a few days. This type of water is like a (good) natural disaster on your body, flooding out excess salt and fluids.
  • Pop ginger root to beat bloat. Gingersnap cookies don’t count! That weird dinosaur in the produce section is what you should be noshing on.

  • Use vinegar as a dressing on your salad or just dump it down your throat. This is the only time acid is good for you!
  • Slow down when you’re hoovering in that extra-large burrito, guac, chips and salsa. It will still be there in five minutes from now, unless your dining companion is Tim “Eater X” Janus.

  • Watch your sodium intake. Sushi may taste good with soy sauce, but the entire bottle is a little much, don’t you think?
  • Take probiotics. Not all bacteria is bad for you!
  • Munch on some parsley or fennel seeds so when you eat those onions, you can ward off a buddha belly and turtle breath.

Celebs (oh yea, and the rest of you too)… if you pay attention to these “rules” and you may just go from;

to…

She may just be a freak though!

  • How do you “de-puff” your stuff? 

Comments

  1. I like to call it a “food baby” hee hee…xoxo, America’s Tweetheart

  2. Lol…love this!

    Many people don’t know that only 1% of bacteria is bad for you. The rest are our friends!!

  3. Parsley needs to help me, Buddha ain’t got nothing on my belly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Hahahahaha

  4. Amber @ ExSoyCise says:

    Oh man I’m so glad I didn’t partake in any Easter treats yesterday! Definitely trying avoid the bloat! These are all great tips! That’s great to know about Parsley for bad breath! I heard that it’s also good for seasonal allergies.

  5. I’m non-pregnant so that’s why I’m bloated..OPPS, TMI! But dandelion root also helps me with water retention..ahhh
    Kat recently posted..#GoalGetter2013 Update: March!My Profile

    • Ha Ha Ha! Never TMI in GiGi World!! LOL. I am so bloated right now! UGH… Worst feeling ever, time to load up on the dandelion for sure!

  6. My Easter was clean as I’m prepping for my comp!

    I eat sushi without the sauce :) Sometimes I have it…but 95% of the time I don’t. I like the flavour of sushi on its own :)
    Kierston @candyfit recently posted..It’s Your Choice: You Make It What You Want!My Profile

    • I love sushi by itself too! :)

      BTW I looveeee reading about your contest prep, your recipes are what my taste buds crave. lol

  7. Gigi have you ever had a stuffed bloated tummy before? What do you do to get rid of it?

    • Of course I have! It takes time to get rid of it, but things that help: peppermint and/or chamomile tea, drinking water, walking… These things help get the bloat and water retention moving! :)

      • Sorry I accidentally posted twice. My comment twice:), my first comment did not show up the first time. However I think I’m becoming your new fan. BTW what is your favorite “I’m so full” saying, which one do you say when your so stuffed?

        • “I might pop” – “I feel like a beached whale” – “I am the Michelin man’s twin” – “You’ll have to roll me out of here” – “I feel like a turkey on Thanksgiving”… I could go on and on! LOL!

  8. Gigi have you ever had a stuffed bloated tummy before?

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