BREAKING NEWS: Cranky Older Woman in Ugg Boots Body Slams Two Innocent Coffee Goers After She Suspected They Swiped Her Pumpkin Spice Latte
LOS ANGELES – With utter rage in her eyes, Maude Henry, 68, of Hollywood, California hurled two innocent customers (names withheld) onto the floor at a Starbucks at Sunset and Gower after suspecting one of them took her Pumpkin Spice Latte.
“Hoodwinks! HOODWINKS I TELL YOU,” Maude shrieked as she was dragged, losing one of her sheepskin Ugg (UGH) boots in the process, to a cop car on Sunset Blvd.
It has yet to be known if the two customers, who claim to have ordered their own respective drinks, a butt-widening venti Pumpkin Spice Frappuccino and a muffin top-enhancing grande Red Velvet Creme Frappuccino, will press charges.
Stay with us as the story develops…
…Well my thought that people tend to get nicer as fall and winter (i.e. the holidays) approach, was just thrown into an overflowing landfill…
Speaking of landfills…. Pumpkin Spice Lattes… Pretty much the equivalent of one of these DUMPING SIGHTS…
So if those “hoodwinks” were actually lying and did in fact take Maude’s drink… Perhaps they were doing her a favor?
I am awarding myself the title of: Sexiest WINKER EVER….
Because twenty ounces of the orange tinted gunk has 64 grams of sugar (and we all know at this point that sugar is Satan in “food” form)!
Now twenty ounces might sound like a hefty dose that no one would be able to gulp down (that’s how many ounces are in a venti-sized drink)… BUT ADMIT IT… You TOTES (Uh no… I swear… Chicks in mini skirts and Ugg boots made me say that!) are known for chugging four one, every few days, as the fall and winter months carry on.
There is just something about the pumpkin spice aroma that gets us all hot and bothered…
Then go buy a pumpkin scented candle…
Make chipkins…
Or if you in fact, really must have the liquid combination of sweet and spice and “everything nice” then do yourself a favor… And watch the latest GiGi Eats!
For the recipe of my REVAMPED Pumpkin Spice Latte that includes a few very outside of the box ingredients (if you watched the video, you know what they are)…
HEAD ON OVER TO KELAPO’S BLOG to get SPICED UP…
So Tell Me…
- If I walked into your house/apartment… Would I feel as though I walked into a Bath & Body Works during the fall season?
- What’s your take on the PSL? Overrated or rated PERFECTLY?
- “Can you even” or “Can’t you even”?
- Have you ever tried to recreate this drink at home? SHARE your recipe! Like, OMG!
- Do you think Maude is one crazy bitch? Or do you think the Pumpkin Spice Latte made her do it?
- Have you ever heard of Kelapo Extra Virgin Coconut Oil? Are you a coconut oil fan in general?
- Do you want to punch those girls who spew out phrases such as: “OMG! Like I’m so bad and TOTES addicted… But this PSL is on fleek!”
This post is sponsored by Kelapo Extra Virgin Coconut Oil… That being said, all opinions are my own, as you ALL KNOW I would tell you the truth! I don’t “sugar-coat” anything… Because common, I can’t eat sugar!
Waste Not, Want Not Wednesday <– I am featured! WOO WOO!