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Mean Girls Is Quite The Holiday Movie

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“Okay seriously Christmas, I’m sorry that [you’re] so jealous of me… I can’t help that I’m so popular!”

“Shove a Kalteen Bar in your pie whole, Thanksgiving. PS: Stop trying to make ‘FETCH’ happen.”

“I can stick my fist in my mouth,” New Year’s Eve chimed in.

The Bachelor Fist in Mouth GiGi Dubois

At that absurd comment, both Thanksgiving and Christmas looked at New Year’s Eve with utter disgust and downright embarrassment.

Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Eve, on the surface seem to be civil with one another, however these holidays actually hold semblance to that of Gretchen WienersRegina George and Karen Smith or in other words, they’re all extremely jealous of one another.

Regina, Gretchen and Karen of Mean Girls as Christmas, New Year's Eve and Thanksgiving

I guess Cady Heron could be considered Kwanzaa because she lived most of her life in Africa after all (however she sort of morphs into Christmas Eve, thanks to not following the moral of this blog post and video).

Kady Haron or Lindsay Lohan as Kwanzaa

I bet if these holidays had a burn book

Christmas would write: Thanksgiving is such a fugly food slut

Thanksgiving Plate of Food

Thanksgiving would jot down: Christmas, you’re just such a hoe… Ho ho

Mrs Claus is a SLUT GiGi Dubois

And New Year’s Eve would scribble: There is a 30% chance that it’s already raining

Karen Smith Mean Girls There is a 30% chance it is already raining

Speaking of rain…. What’s the point of raining on someone else’s parade? Why does jealousy take such a strong hold of us? Do you see how far it got the ladies of Mean Girls

Regina George broken neck

I have the SLIGHTEST feeling that when YOU go home for the holidays, and you see your siblings, cousins, parents, step-parents, aunts, uncles, (step god children, twice removed and readopted?) and other relatives/friends… You might feel a truckload twinge of disdain as they BRAG AND BRAG about how they just got a $30k pay raise at work, lost 40 pounds by eating ONLY processed sugary GARBAGE or how their infant baby already graduated from an Ivy League college and is now building a website that will triumph Facebook. 

smart baby

Well Giovanna and I are here to help you WRANGLE IN your INNER BITCH that literally wants to come out and sucker punch Aunt Sally… Check out our collaborative video BELOW:

So tell me…

  • Are you excited for the upcoming holidays? Which holiday is your favorite?
  • Admit it: are you the jealous type? How do you wrangle in your comparative nature?
  • Favorite MEAN GIRLS quote… GO!
  • Giovanna and I are actually starting a new show together called Relationship Roulette, check it out here and let us know if you’d tune in! 
  • Do you have a Ms or Mr PERFECT in your life that you just want to slap?
  • What celebrity do you think is “perfect” in your eyes and why?
  • What other holidays do you see characters in Mean Girls as? Perhaps Aaron Samuels is… Boxing Day? **Winky Face**