web analytics
Skip to content

Let’s Get Toasted and Smash

  • by
keto approved avocado toast gigi eats celebrities

Remember when you used to celebrate Valentine’s Day in grade school?

Valentines-Day-in-Schools

You used to dedicate at least a half a day (FORK YES! NO MATH CLASS!!) to creating Valentine’s Day themed crafts, notes and goodies… And later you’d channel a postal worker by delivering said creations to your friends, classmates and teachers.

pre-school-valentines-day-cards-featured

But then… You spot “Johnny,” rockin’ his green backwards cap that stupid “Billy” ripped a little, but always looks good in, or “Rebecca,” in her patched jean overall shorts and knee high socks that matches her headband, over there… And break into a cold sweat.

USHER THERE GOES MY BABY

After what feels like a minor heart attack, you finally muster up the courage to… Ask your bestie to put your specially made heart-shaped card (your soul mate deserves much more than just one of those generic Sponge Bob Square Pants Cards your mom bought for you at RiteAid) that took hours to construct into your crushes’ “mailbox” at his/her desk…

heart-snail-craft

When this transaction was completed though… You suddenly realize the love of your LIFE is most likely going to think your best friend was the one confessing his/her love.

lion hell no

CRAP! Now THEY’RE going to ride off into the sunset on a majestic white unicorn…

unicorn

AAANNNDDDD this was the day… You decided that Valentine’s Day is the worst.

anti-valentines-card-funny-cupid-singles-valentine-day-sucks

It’s a good thing you hate said “holiday” anyways because romance has pretty much died with the advancements of technology.

Technology Romance

Now it seems as though this is how people “celebrate” said day:

“Happy Valentine’s Day… Here’s a picture of my dick…”

ELEPHANT DICK

or

“Your Valentine’s Day wouldn’t be complete without some sweet buns…”

my-dad-found-the-valentines-day-gift-l-got-my

And sigh.

Thankfully, I am confident that all of you reading this right now are of the classy variety, and have never sent such massages to RANDOM people. Now if this is something you and your significant other like to do, by all means… SEND THAT TEXT… In fact, don’t just sent a picture… Send a video?

sexting fail

Speaking of video, I’ve got one for you today……..

GIGI EATS CENSORED

Of course THAT is what you’re thinking but I can assure you, the video I have for you is not THAT KIND of sexy… However, this video might need to be rated at least PG-13 because the recipe itself… Is rather creamy with a hint of crunch that is currently quite the craze.

So uh, yeah, hey there… I just want to TOAST to you and say Happy Valentine’s Day… Now check out my avocados

And technology has killed my ability to romance as well apparently…

SWOON-WORTHY AVOCADO “TOAST”

100% Keto-Approved & All Flours Free

avocado toast keto approved gigi eats

Meet Your TRUE Soul Mate…

avocado toast with turkey

SO TELL ME…

  • How will you be spending (or how did you) your Valentine’s Day?
  • Be honest, have you ever sent a sexy photo/video via text message?
  • Do you feel as though romance has been dying as technology has advanced?
  • Tell me a funny story about your experience with celebrating Valentine’s Day in grade school!
  • Avocado Toast: A ridiculous FAD that needs to JUST STOP or your Valentine?!
  • What are your thoughts on a TURKEY “bread”?
  • Are you friends with “Johnny” or “Rebecca” on Facebook?

valentines-card-spongebob-bottom