To me, “torture” could be described as going to Ikea, then taking a “quick” trip to Costco, followed by a Home Depot “run”… All starting at 7pm on a, lets say, Thursday (hi, RUSH HOUR traffic), while being absolutely, positively starving… Like horrific stomach ache, hungry… Then getting stuck in bumper to bumper traffic for two hours on the way to your favorite sushi restaurant so as to FINALLY feed your inner dog-hungry demon… That winds up giving you food poisoning because it was left out too long.

“Torture” in my mind could also be described as being TRAPPED in the middle seat of row 34 on an overheated airplane on the tarmac with a pounding migraine and stabbing menstrual cramps, as triplets throw the most epic of tantrums in the row behind you and your seat mate who took over your shared armrest whips out a fried-fish sandwich… Only to find out that the flight has been grounded yet cannot go back to the terminal for at least another hour and a half due to another plane being at the gate.

Of course… “Torture” comes in all forms (and yes, my “torture” examples are definitely #firstworldproblems, so I will take a minute to appreciate the fact that I am able to do all these things even when I want to punch a concrete wall during such events)… And I can only imagine what images you might be conjuring up in your brain right now in regards to what your misery might include (do tell me in the comments below!)

As for my husband Landon, I have a feeling… Even though I made him that GLORIOUSLY CREAMY banana cream pie with a CRUNCHY GRAHAM CRACKER CRUST for his birthday… His form of torture is most likely… Being married to me.

I kid. I kid…? Although he may be reading this right now thinking, “YOU’RE 100% CORRECT, Genevieve!”… Yes, he calls me by my FULL NAME.

The reason why that statement may actually hold a glimmer of truth at this moment in time is because, well… This is the THIRD YEAR IN A ROW where I went to The Natural Products Expo (Expo West)… The world’s LARGEST natural, organic and healthy products event held in Anaheim, CA… Gathered ALL THE FOOD offered, and I mean ALL. THE. FOOD. (you legit can get ALL your groceries and supplements for the next 2 months after just one day roaming around the shindig)…

And then FORCED Landon to taste test a select few products that sounded rather head-scratching on camera so as to let all of YOU know whether or not you’d wind up TORTURING yourself by trying them, yourself.

If you’re new around these parts of the internets… Then you might not know that Landon… Yeah, he’s unfiltered… Much like yours truly. But if you can believe it, he’s actually worse, but only in the most comical of ways.

That being said, I MUST WARN you before you click PLAY on THE THIRD ANNUAL “TORTURE LANDON EVENT”… That there is a lot of ADULT LANGUAGE and HUMOR sprinkled throughout the video… I mean, being tortured brings out the “FORKS” in everyone, right? So if hearing people cuss like sailors is your personal version of TORTURE… You may just want to watch this video… ON SILENT (our facial expressions speak volumes).

THE THIRD ANNUAL “TORTURE LANDON EVENT” 

THE FOODS UNDER SCRUTINY ARE AS FOLLOWS: 

• Skinny Salamis, Lamb Shawarma
• Figgy Pops, Mangoberry Supersnacks
• Beechnut Yogurt Melties, Sweet Potato, Mango & Yogurt
• And I Love You, Naked Essentials
• Ready Nutrition, Planted Based Protein Chocolate Cookie (yet to hit store shelves)
• From The Ground Up, Cauliflower Pretzels
• Meat Snx, Chik Pro
• Bakerly, Crunchy Crepes
• Live Kuna Kuna Pops, Quinoa & Chia
• Ice Chips, Chocolate Brownie
• The Real Coconut, Ginger Molasses Cookies
• The NO COW Bar, Peanut Butter Chocolate
• Skinny Shirataki Noodles
• DNX Grass-Fed Beef Bar, Jamaican Style
• Chapul, Chaco Bar, Chocolate Peanut Butter
• Goodbelly Crunchy Bar, Chocolate Peanut Butter
• Xylichew, Spearmint

SO TELL ME/US… 

• What is the most disgusting “healthy product” you’ve ever tried?
• What is your form of the worst “torture”?
• Which product that Landon tried… Would you be intrigued to try despite his rating?
• Did you happen to go to Expo West (or are you going to Expo East) this year?
• Are you a fan of golf? If you are check here the best callaway edge golf clubs reviews.
• Do you think it would SUCK to be married to me?
• Have you ever tried any of the products Landon put in his mouth? Thoughts?

IF YOU WANT SOME OF THE PRODUCTS I GATHERED AT THE EXPO HERE IS WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO TO ENTER:

• SUBSCRIBE TO LANDON’S YOUTUBE CHANNEL
• SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL (if you haven’t already)
• Comment the CODE PHRASE: TIGER WOODS on THE TASTE TEST VIDEO
• FOLLOW LANDON & I ON OUR INSTAGRAM PAGE (@MYHUSBANDHATESME)
• YOU CAN FOLLOW US ON FACEBOOK TOO!

LANDON will be selecting the WINNER on APRIL 4th!