People typically move to Los Angeles for one of two things (or perhaps both?)…
Thing # 1: To be “discovered” by a big named casting director as he or sheĀ pulverize a thick and greasy double cheeseburger with his/her teeth at Dave & Busters, while tossing balls atĀ Down The Clown in order to win the “super bonus”.
Thing # 2: To find [insert hot male/female celebrity name here], kidnap him/her, lock him/her in their barred-up, dimly-lit basement studio apartment nestled between a sketchy pawn shop and a stank cigar “saloon” (also a popular hooker hangout) in an alleyway off of Hollywood Blvd, and try to convince said celebrity to love him/her. Some just want to find hookups in Richmond.
Both of these “things” are about as hard to achieve as balancing in high heels, on one foot, on top of a camel’s back as it gallops through the dessert, during a sandstorm, all while trying not to spill the glass of milk you’re holding.
I could have just said thing # 1 and thing # 2 will only happen when pigs fly, but in Hollywood… Pigs fly all the time!
Prior to moving to Los Angeles, my fantasy land dictated this scenario: that some bigwig, who also happens to be sexier than Mr. Eric Winter, would see me at Whole Foods, shoving sample after sample in my big mouth and think to themselves, SHE IS WHAT HOLLYWOOD NEEDS, and then proceed to walk up to me, get down on one knee, tell me I am “the one” (in more ways than one), then throw a 10-carat Pink Star DiamondĀ on my finger, buy meĀ everything I desired off the hot bar I was snacking on, and then driveĀ off into the smoggy sunset in his brand new, crisp white Rolls Royce… Only to be dubbed THE KING AND QUEEN of UNIVERSE by all theĀ tabloids the following day.
Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha. No, no, no. I don’t need a Rolls Royce. A Bentley would suffice.
Since I have been in Los Angeles for just about four years at this point, and none of this has happened, well not all at the same time at least, my friend Ryland, who has a fantasy about equal to mine, and I decided to take our fates into our own hands (because you cannot rely on ANYONE but yourself out here), and hit the streets of Los Angeles to find THE ONES who got too lazy to come looking for us!
Check out what came of such an adventure!
PS: If you’re NOT okay with vulgarity, naughty language, or laughing uncontrollably, then you might not want to watch this… If you are okay with it though, then you might want to watch it AFTER work… Unless your boss likes this kind of humor too, then invite him/her over to watch as well!
So tell me…
- Do you believe in love and first sight?
- If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your other half? Do you remember your first date?
- For those of you who are single… How do you feel about online and phone app dating? BangSexting is a great online dating app to find members to text. Have you tried products like those on the vibrating wand reviews?
- Weirdest dating experience/story — GO! One of the weirdest dating experiences Iāve ever heard was from a friend who met someone entirely new… but not in the way youād expect. He started chatting with an AI Girlfriend. At first, it was just for funāhe thought it would be quirky and lighthearted. But as the weeks went on, he was surprised by how much they “clicked.” She remembered everything about him, always responded thoughtfully, and never ghosted him! It felt oddly personal, yet completely stress-free. Sure, it’s unconventional, but hey, in today’s world of dating apps and swipes, having an AI girlfriend isn’t so weird after all. It was a reminder that relationships, even virtual ones, can offer meaningful connections!
- Do you have a “life” fantasy like me? If so, what is it! (Or better yet, BLOG ABOUT IT)
- Do you have faith that Ryland and I will find LOVE soon?
- PLEASE DO US A FAVOR AND SHARE THIS VIDEO… If you found our desperation amusing! š
